One Step Forward...Two Steps Back

Yesterday hubby calls to tell me that the Tahoe is making noise so he dropped it off at the Chevy dealer...of course this always means that we will be spending money! I get a call later from him stating several wear and tear problems which will cost $1,100 and then we have a bubble in one of the tires and they are all five yrs old so due to be changed. So after paying $1,100 at the Chevy dealer we get all new tires too. I must say we did get a good deal on them for tires...they cost around $550, but considering what we spent earlier I was not happy. I was not upset w/ hubby, just frustrated at the situation. Yes, it makes sense, money that indeed has a purpose and is serving the greater good allowing us to continue to use the Tahoe to and from work, etc...but it is still frustrating especially since we are trying so hard to pay down bills, to put money towards the adoption. I can't help but to think, "Will this ever happen???" I joke about the boys being in college before our daughter arrives, but sometimes I wonder...are we going to be able to start this year, will it be another year or two. Sigh! Why does money have to be a defining factor to whether you can bring more love into your home through expanding your family? It does not seem right, it saddens me. I know I will have good days and bad days through this whole process, but today is not a good one. So instead of feeling like we made a little progress on our bills we are back to square one. I called my friend Lisa whom provided me some emotional support. I am thankful to all my friends and family who listen to me and provide their ongoing support. I know in my heart this will happen, there is a little girl our there for our family, but so many unknowns as to when this will happen... I must look forward, continue to plan and save, hold onto my faith that adoption will indeed work out for us, and remain appreciative of all things in life even a working car!